Slide Rules for the Slide that Rules!
The Terranea waterslide delivers 140 feet of twisting turning thrills. In fact, it's so ridiculously fun, we had to make a few rules to keep the resort pool from going completely nuts. To ensure your safety and maximum enjoyment of the slide, please observe the following guidelines:
1. If you are taller than 48 inches and can swim by yourself, you can use the slide - but only if you read and follow the rest of the rules below. If you still have some growing to do and haven't quite passed you swim lessons, you get to laugh at the funny faces people make as they go down.
2. Arm floats and life vests without buckles are permitted to assist with swimming, but you'll still need to prove you don't need them.
3. The Lifeguard on duty is the Supreme Ruler of the Slide. He or she reserves the right to ask you to demonstrate your swimming ability; if you're not quite ready yet, you won't be able to use the slide. Period. We want you to enjoy all the other fun stuff at Terranea.
4. Only one person can be on the slide at a time. If you like tandem, try bobsledding.
5. Continuing from #4, parents may escort children to the top of the slide, where the child must be set free to ride the slide alone. Sorry, the one-person-at-a-time rule applies to parents and their children, too.
6. Your feet have to go first and you must be on your bottom or your backs. Even Superman has to slide this way when he visits Terranea.
7. Once you hit the splash pool at the bottom, please exit immediately. The sooner you get out, the sooner you can go back up and ride the slide again.
8. Please do not run up the stairs. It's not cool, and you're on vacation.
9. Please be nice and courteous and obey the instructions of the Lifeguard (you know, The Supreme Ruler of the Slide). Any behavior that the Lifeguard deems to be rowdy or unsafe will not be tolerated and will result in the loss of waterslide privileges.
Oh, and one more thing...if you can help keep the waterslide fun and safe, the Lifeguard just might tell you how to go really, really fast.